we got a rototiller, ripped up 8 feet of roots three feet deep and up, mulched, tilled, furrowed, and planted in a thunderstorm CORN rows up against our far right fence wall. just in time for the sun to come out and the fence to shade the corn. boo hiss!
brandon's been helping kirby uncover a leaking pipe up at the cabin that apparently has been leaking 1.4 million dollars of water for who knows how long.
last time i saw him he was covered in mud and clomping it through my freshly vacuumed house.
boo hiss number 2.
in his defense the man needed something to eat before he passed out.
he's as tired as i am.
also he was sweet enough to make sure i knew not to take it too hard working in the yard and not to put myself into labor.
i thought that was really nice.
people keep asking if i'm going to be induced because of how uncomfortable i am, or because she is fully developed this next week- but i have to say, as convenient as that would be (and a LOT of mothers do it... like an incredible amount, and early) i'm just gonna ride this one out until we pass my due date by a week.
or so.
even though i want to meet this little girl more than anything else ive ever wanted in my whole life- (and i can remember wanting this when i was even a little girl myself, wanting a baby of my own. walking around with my doll under my nightgown) it's more important to me that she is ready to come into this world than my comfort. i mean, i'm claustrophobic, and sweaty, and i can't bend over or squat or really do anything- i puke up 1/3 of what i eat- and feel sick the rest of the time- i just trust my body and i know that hopefully it will know what to do- and if it turns out that it doesn't (since this IS my first time carrying full term) then i'll take a little help from my medical friends and induce.
i just want to avoid that if i can.
but i also dont want them to have to rip me open because she got too big to come out the way she was supposed to. (csection)
how do you be realistic about all the options and calm about them all?
it's tough because i want to plan the whole birth experience, i have an opinion on mostly all of it- but if one thing changes or goes differently then the whole plan is scrapped, and my MAIN GOAL: is to have a labor experience that i am happy with, that i can relax and enjoy because i PLANNED IT. i don't want to be disappointed by things that might go wrong, or changing the whole thing. (which is part of the reason why i'm saying give me that epidural as soon as you can- my anxiety alone would kill this baby if i wasn't aware of it) (although, you natural birthers, you granola go getters, YOU ARE AWESOME AND IMPRESSIVE AND AMAZING AND i wish i was you)
my pain tolerance. is ...
not high.
i'm aware of my body.
in fact, i like to give everyone around me updates constantly on how aware i am exactly.
i've done it since i was little.
sorry mom.
maybe it just stems from saying, "i have to go to the bathroom!" and making sure people know my needs.
otherwise i'm pretty quiet.
anywho. i hope the corn grows, i hope peanut grows, i hope i can grow fast enough for this next new adventure that is coming closer and closer.
it's spring. there's a lot of growing to be done.
tomorrow we are celebrating b's mother- my mother in law. i feel so lucky to have her as my mother in law. i relate to a lot of her, and she always cheers me up. she is a friend to everyone, and is always meeting new people. (which is sometimes hard for them... since our society is so CLOSED, and in their own world) she is encouraging and kind and works very hard at everything she does.
she inspires me to become more.
and she taught me how to make the best pie crust in the whole entire world.
she was a fabulous mother to her children and her love for her grandkids is unparallelled.
the woman is never going to die because she makes sure that her life is filled with purpose and direction.
and i'm grateful for her.
in honor of celebrating her i get to bring dessert and let me tell you, i'm almost as excited about this dessert as i am about having her as a mother in law.
fresh strawberry pie and triple chocolate mousse pie.
numnumnum love your mum.
2 comments:
Atta girl! I'm glad you're not inducing just to be comfy. Your body probably knows what it's doing, and if you can avoid inducement drugs, do it! If she's way past "done" or something, than it makes sense, but I'm glad you're carrying her to term. You inspire me. I'm so glad I have friends who got pregnant before I do; I have so many incredible women to learn from. I can't wait to see pictures of your little girl!!
Being induced is not fun, trust me! That pitocin is no bueno. However, I was overdue and my umbilical cord had a perfect knot in it so Caiden could have died had I not induced because food and oxygen flow through the cord. Luckily I was really healthy while I was pregnant so my cord was really thick.
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