strawberry fields forever

boy, we've had a few interesting days around here...

yesterday i was sitting in the livingroom when our favorite (and first) christmas hen: little red (this is her following me around the backyard)


(she's a buff orpington: this doesn't matter to most people but you need to know that before we got the chickens i did a LOT of research on what breeds to get and our little buff is perfect and i feel smart saying it.) anyways, i heard a clunking sound and i peeked out the window to see little red on top of our rod iron fence
that lines the basement backyard staircase walking the rod like a tight rope back and forth, fluffing her feathers like the queen of sheeba. she really thought she was quite clever for getting up there and i admired her balance and agility for a while until she made...

the leap.

apparently in her sense of cocky (ha ha) security she decided to move to another side of the rod and made a big fluttering leap which resulted in her chin (do hens have chins?) (that area of her body) hitting the rod and her falling down into the bottom of the stairwell.

i seriously thought she was dead.

there was no movement from down there and so i threw on brandon's sandles and ran outside- all of the other hens had run over to see when the sound was

i peeked over the edge of the banister, hoping not to see my beloved buff orpington dead at the bottom and she was gone! she was already hopping up the stairs, crowing and looking around

and it reminded me of every single time i've done something REALLY embarrassing and hurt myself and then tried to act like nothing happened.

i knew she was embarrassed because there were four juicy HUGE worms at the bottom of that stairwell- and so it was a christmas miracle for the hen who lived from a fifteen foot drop, and for the worms who lived in spite of the chicken.

as if that wasn't enough trauma for one day for one little hen (and i have to made note that i don't watch them all day so who knows what other shenanigains these birds get into when i'm not around?)

later that day, i picked brandon up from school in our now safe car and came home. when we came into the livingroom i heard Dash,

our now not so little boxer/lab puppy, barking. Dash rarely barks, so brandon lifted up the blinds to see what his problem was- wihtout thinking, brandon lifted the backyard blinds instead of the side yard blinds because that's where the barking was coming from.

THE BARKING WAS COMING FROM THE BACK YARD


Dash, had somehow escaped his side yard confinement and was now in the back yard, with the chickens.

hopefully.

because all we saw, were FEATHERS EVERYWHERE and dash barking.

(these feathers are all still here. so if you're making pillows...)

we had just gotten home and who KNOWS how long he was out there, so b and i sprang into action- i truly thought all of my little hens were dog meat.

brandon went out and called dash who happily ran into the house- licking his lips with joy.

i was trying to get my shoes back on and locked dash in his kennel in the garage and then headed out CERTAIN that even though i was lucky enough to avoid one dead pet this morning that the backyard was now going to look like an epic battlefield of dead chickens and feathers and blood.

but when i got out there all i saw were feathers.

i kind of was relieved because then at least i wouldnt have to see the bodies of those little birds that i talk to, croon to, and collect eggs from.

but brandon was convinced the bodies were out there.

so we began a hunt- no, not for easter eggs- for the egg layers themselves. the hens.

the first two we found were diaper butt



and the pretty one (i really call them this.) they are silver wyandottes and are beautiful beautiful hens.


i was surprised we found them first because ALL of the feathers in the yard belonged to them. (all our hens are different colors/breeds except these two) they were cowering behind the stairwell and were very very distraught. but otherwise- unharmed. (good thing it is getting warmer outside because their bums were... lacking feathers.) (poor things)

the next we found was little red.
we weren't sure if she was okay because her entire body was crammed into the backyard rock wall underneath a huge rock.

in her panic, she had run straight into the first hole she could find, and then found that she couldn't get OUT of it. she was clucking and kicking, her bum was hanging out and her feet. our once proud bird was having a very very humbling day.

now the only one missing was kramer- kramer is an arucauna, and easter hen- she lays beautiful blue green eggs that are huge-

ironically, kramer is the ugliest hen we have and she is very very curious. she is last in the pecking order- the others dont allow her to eat until they've had their fill, and so she wanders kind of lost looking until it is her turn. she hops on the benches, and she has white and brown mottled feathers and a small white mustache. i call her kramer, because she makes me laugh and she is def. an oddball.


(note: if i was a chicken i would probably be kramer.)

brandon said he had checked the coop (because it was afternoon and that's when they usually lay eggs) but that kramer wasn't in there. i went and checked again and sure enough, she was smooshed up against the farthest laying box from the coop entrance, with her head buried in cedar chips. she blends right in with the chips.

i had to laugh a little 1. with relief and 2. that the youngest, ugliest, and least dominant chicken had been smart enough to hide inside the chicken coop while the others all desperately tried to survive.

the coop ramp was pushed aside, so i know dash took a visit. and i was really angry at him for a long time yesterday: but then i remembered that those birds are always teasing dash and that this dog had had his day. finally.

im just glad everyone was alive.

i dont expect any eggs this weekend. (but i did just go outside and find some eggs, ignore the ping pong ball that's just what we used to train them to lay in the boxes)



i feel like the whole experience almost put my egg into labor by itself.


longest post ever.
i'm really sorry.

but i still have to tell you about today!
today i went in to make sure i'm weighing/measuring okay
i wasn't really sure which direction grace has been facing, if she was breached or not still- and i was sorta worried that i'd been poking her in the eyeballs everytime i push whatever was jabbing into my ribs out of them.
good news! Graceelaine cochran is not breached, and what i've been poking is NOT her head, but indeed her GIANT BUM! hooray! she has mom and dad's bum! and her little head is right in my pelvis. this baby is getting ready to get here already!

i am so excited!

i am also gaining about a pound a week from here on out and expect to weigh 170 by the time she is born. PEOPLE, I COULD BE ON THE BIGGEST LOSER! just kidding, but i'm sort of terrified of that number.

that's all folks! for today, hopefully there wont be any more exciting animal stories to tell you, and i'm going to have to make a sign for the side yard that says DO NOT LET THIS DOG INTO THE BACKYARD.


MAKE SURE THE GATE IS LATCHED. so that when the meter guy comes again our birds are spared.

also; when you are pregnant: never eat an entire box of strawberries for breakfast. eat them for dessert or dinner, but not for breakfast.

just word to the wise.